The Joys of Online Dating and the Single Dad

While being a single parent has many advantages, sometimes it does get lonely, especially while traveling. Trying to date while on the road is a challenge for people with children, but when you add being gay into the mix, it’s a bit more complicated.

And when you’re a gay man in a homophobic culture, it gets even more interesting.

As there aren’t really a lot of LGBT meeting places in Romania (I think there are around 4 bars/clubs in the whole country), and because the queer community often is very closeted, one of the more popular ways of meeting people is through online dating.

I’ve made some good friends from online dating attempts in the past; however, it’s never resulted in a romantic relationship. After spending some time with some rather nice couples (both gay and straight) who initially met online, I decided I would ignore past experiences and give it a try again.

It has been . . . shall we say. . . amusing to say the least.

online dating

Gentleman A

One of my favorite first experiences was the man who said he was looking for a long-term relationship. I messaged him, and in my response message I asked what type of interests he has.

He responded with 3 photos of his erect member, all from different angles.

I guess you have to applaud his thoroughness.

Gentleman B

A rather handsome man contacted me from London. He had a wonderful profile, so I decided to go ahead and read his message. Within the first paragraph, I was informed that when he saw my photo he knew we were supposed to be together (even if that sounds weird), and he wanted me to know that he would happily relocate to “anywhere in the world” so that we could be together.

As he mentioned that he worked out every day so he could stay fit and that he was a Christian, I felt it was important to point out, in case his vision and reading comprehension weren’t that great, that I do not have a fit body and that I’m not a Christian and am really pretty much anti-religion. He reassured me that all he wanted was my heart.

I’m sure you’ll be surprised to know his interest level didn’t last more than 3 messages. Glad I hadn’t picked out my wedding tux!

Gentleman C

This was an interesting one whose profile indicates he lives in Bucharest. Unfortunately, after contacting him I discovered he in fact is originally from Romania but had moved with a parent to Nigeria when he was a small child. He is now looking to return back to Romania and would really like to live “with my man so I can be near him” while he looks for a job. He thinks we are a match made in heaven and would like to know when he can move in.

Needless to say, that didn’t get very far.

These are just some of the fun ones I’ve had in the last 2 weeks or so. Do straight people have this much fun doing online dating? Just curious.

Let me know your experiences, the bitter and the sweet.

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  1. Awwww… but somebody out there gotta still believe in romance and love, right? Right? 😀

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  2. I love this post. I think there is great comedic value in online dating. I sure hope you manage to get past the crazies and find someone to keep you warm at night. I so applaud your adventures with your son. You are both amazing. I would be happy if my son manages even half the experiences of your little guy. Happy Travels to you both <3

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    • Thanks for the kind words! And yes, there is a LOT of comedic value in online dating. I think I may start saving the majority of the entertaining ones for a compilation later. 😀

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  3. I’m sorry to hear this isn’t working out for you. The heartache must suck pretty bad!

    I have my fingers crossed for you meeting Mr. Right. 🙂

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    • I wouldn’t say it isn’t working out. At least I’m getting a lot of entertainment from it. 😀 Keep those fingers crossed!

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  4. Oh Talon, you’re fun has just begun. I have been online dating off and on for the last 15 years, one connection led to a 7 year live-in relationship, and another led to an 8-month live-in relationship (pure emotional hell). I have read lots and lots of profiles over the years, they are very interesting reading. Oddly enough I have never been stood up (this in around 20 meets, so not too bad), and only 1 person was not interested in meeting again, which was okay with me. I made the rule that I will not meet without at least one phone conversation first, helps to weed out the total freaks. I always set up the time and place, usually daytime with lots of people around, and absolutely no alcohol (helps keep me from doing something totally stupid). I have read that the more serious folks use paid sites but I have actually more luck with the free ones. My current relationship is from online, 2+ years so far. I am actually enjoying this one, no co-habitation which is nice, neither of us is pushing for that. He lives about one and one-half hours away in a really cool house in the sticks, it’s like going to a bed & breakfast every weekend. I don’t have a lot of horror stories for you, for me it has been a pleasant experience (maybe I just have really good weirdo radar). At any rate I wish you good luck – A good man is hard to find but they do exist.

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  5. Ha ha, you are very much not alone. I have received ‘interesting photos’ been sort of stood up and had the one guy who turned up for a dinner date and then refused to order anything to eat and then he spent the last half hour of the date complaining about being hungry! I’m considering becoming a nun!!

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  6. Which site are you using, may I ask, Talon? A doesn’t surprise me at all, but B and C are a little more unusual! At the very least, this all certainly makes for a good story!

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    • Definitely make for some good entertainment. I’ve been using PlanetRomeo (formerly known as GayRomeo) and OKCupid (which has been an absolute bust so far).

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  7. Ha! Tis is such a good post. I’ve given up dating full stop (online or not).
    I’m of the philosophy that if someone comes along and it’s meant to turn into a relationship, then it will.
    Meantime, I enjoy my friends and travelling.
    Would love to hear more of your funny tales from the internet though, I bet you could write a book.

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    • It has definitely been entertaining so far. Every so often I give up on dating and end up coming back and giving it another go. I don’t know why yet. Maybe I just an occasional something else to make me laugh.

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  8. Stewie seems to have the right perspective, doesn’t he?!

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