Following gut instinct = big change

We’ve been in Playa del Carmen for nearly a month. We were here to assess the area as a long-term base. And, well, it just wasn’t working for me. Rather than be miserable, we’ve moved elsewhere.

While Playa del Carmen is perfect for some people, it just wasn’t working for us. We arranged to sublet a house while the renters were away for a few months. It wasn’t the most ideal location, but we figured it would work enough that it would be okay.

Gut instinct

The longer we stayed in Playa, though, the less it felt like home for the both of us. Tigger even said, “I don’t think we’re going to end up living here as our base.”

I was beyond that point. It just wasn’t working for me. I tried to stay open minded and reframe some things, but I started to feel miserable. I began to feel trapped, and that just isn’t a feeling that works well for me.

Some friends of ours who live in Cozumel have birthdays right around mine, and we headed to Cozumel to help them celebrate their special days.

As we stepped off the ferry and braced ourselves to pass through the gauntlet of touts, we both shared a similar unexpected feeling—We felt like we were home.

While in Playa, I kept thinking “Our friend moves here in September. That will change things.” I was holding out for their arrival. That was all fine and good until I received a message that said: “I have bad news.” I replied, “Will I want to kick your butt?” When she answered yes, I knew what she was going to say and felt devastated.

The only thing that kept me clinging to this area was that she and her family would be joining us in September. We love them and would be thrilled to once again have time with them. Now she wasn’t coming, and I felt even more trapped.

Tigger and I discussed it. He didn’t want to stay, and I definitely didn’t want to. We considered moving to the Pacific side of Mexico, but after doing some research that just wasn’t working for me either.

Gut instinct

Meanwhile we gathered with friends and ran into people we knew, and Cozumel beckoned to us even more loudly. Finally, I decided to listen to my gut instinct, and we discussed staying here until it was time to leave Mexico to renew our visa and for our house sit in December.

I immediately got in touch with people we knew from our time here 2 years ago, and within an hour we had an offer for a house sit, free accommodation, and the landlady of a place we stayed at previously gave us an attractive offer.

As soon as I made the decision and started talking to people, it was like a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders. The threatening clouds of depression quickly dispersed, and I felt such a huge sense of relief.

Playa del Carmen just wasn’t for us. Most of the beaches smelled like sewage, the area felt depressed while rents have nearly doubed, and it felt even less Mexican than it did two years ago when we were there last. While Cozumel isn’t exactly a hub of typical Mexican culture, it’s laidback and feels like home to us.

And that last part is more important than anything.

So we’re going to stay here until at least the end of November. Will it become our long-term base? Possibly. We won’t know until we leave most likely. Cozumel has always called us back, so it wouldn’t surprise me. At the same time I hear Europe calling me back much more strongly, although Tigger doesn’t share that feeling. For now.

We shall see. But for sure I’ll be listening to that gut instinct much more strongly next time. It hasn’t failed us yet!

Have you had a similar experience where you followed your gut and ended up on an entirely different path/route?

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46 Comments

  1. I knew within a few days of moving to St John’s, Newfoundland, that it wasn’t the right place for me. It was right on paper, and I couldn’t pinpoint a single wrong thing. But it just wasn’t right. I was there for grad school so I fought that feeling for a year, even switching to a LONGER program in the hopes that something would change. It never did and I wish I had listened to my gut, which was SCREAMING at me to make a change!

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    • Wow! You sure gave it the effort! I know some places just need more time, like Bangkok for us, but I don’t think I could be as patient as you were!

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  2. I’m so sorry to hear that Playa didn’t work for you! You are right about the smell in the beaches, we used to travel far to enjoy the long and quiet beaches or the Cenotes.
    Besides, this time of the year is crowded with tourist and locals enjoying summer vacation.
    Playa is not the fisher town it used to be years ago and as it’s growing, the prices do too.

    In 5 years living in Playa, we’ve never visit Cozumel, just a few hours to do some paperwork. Hope to see you two again!
    I’m glad you finally feel at home.

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  3. Honestly, I follow my gut more often than not, and it’s almost always right. I may have some kind of empathy gene that guides me that way. When traveling, your instinct goes a long way toward telling you what you should and should not be doing. It’s a survival instinct. I’m glad you listened to your gut rather than your mind, in this instance.

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  4. I can definitely see why you wouldn’t want to stay in Playa del Carmen – I didn’t like the place. If Cozumel feels like home, then that is where you should be. You definitely just have to go with your gut sometimes.

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    • Playa is even worse now than it was 2 years ago. Cozumel is definitely an enjoyable place for us. I doubt it will become our long-term base, but we’re enjoying settling here for a few months.

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  5. What I love most about this are the life lessons that you Tigger is learning about the importance of instinct combined with thoughtfulness. Glad you are doing what feels right.

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    • It’s been a great education for me but even more so for him. It will be interesting to see how all this plays out for him as an adult.

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  6. Yes, I agree, it takes that gut feeling about a place. And I’m not talking about the one after you drink the Mexican water either.

    We considered both of those areas as a base too and in the end wound up clear over on the Coast of Spain instead after traveling through and getting that gut feeling in a small town on the Mediterranean Cost. Not there full time yet but we’ll find out if our gut feeling was right or just the result of too many Mohitos…

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    • That cracked me up! While we do like it here, I don’t see it being our base. I think most likely it will end up being Europe somewhere. Time will tell. But I’ll be listening to that gut!

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  7. So glad you all trusted your gut and are making the move. I can only imagine how tough it is to find a comfortable base after traveling for so long. But, after following you guys for the last year or so, I can see how important it is, especially for your son. You are doing an amazing job! 🙂

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    • Thank you! Yes, it can be really tough finding a base after everything for sure. Kind of a fun project, though. You look at areas in a different light.

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  8. One of the benefits of this nomad thing is just being able to up sticks and go where the hell you want, right? Sounds like you totally did he right thing to me.

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  9. I am so happy to hear that you guys feel at home now! Everything for a reason I guess, maybe us not being able to get there in time was to allow you guys to find your happy place!

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    • We would’ve really enjoyed our time with you guys, but without you there was definitely no reason to stay in Playa. That’s for sure.

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  10. Good on you for listening to your gut – and I just love how you take your son’s thoughts on board. That makes me smile. Wishing you much happiness.

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  11. Sometimes it really pays off to listen to that inner voice. There may have been something bigger that had not yet become clear. Glad you’re feeling better about the surroundings. And I think too there is always a bit of a risk going back to what we remember, sometimes the new realities don’t measure up to the memories.

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    • It truly does pay off. Always a good idea to listen to it. It’s so nice to feel happy about where we are and what’s going on again. That last almost month was rough.

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  12. I guess Playa del Carmen is such a hotbed for tourism that it detracts from the quality of life.
    Hope your move is just what you want!

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    • I think part of it is the city is much younger than some other areas. Playa is still trying to figure out what it’s going to be, and unfortunately it looks like it’s going to land on the side of catering mostly to tourists.

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  13. The most important thing is to be honest with yourself and make a quick decision to move on if you are not happy where you are. So you two did well! And we absolutely love Cozumel. We used to go there often while working on a cruise ship. Let me know if El Abuelo Gerardo restaurant is still open, and if it’s any good these days. Makes me nostalgic to think about Cozumel :).

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    • I haven’t heard of that restaurant. I’ll have to see if it’s still around. I definitely agree about needing to just move when you aren’t happy where you’re at. Sometimes such a simple change can have so much punch.

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  14. You gotta go with your gut. I’ve read tons of good things about Playa del Carmen, but then I’ve also read a lot of not so good things lately. Too touristy, too expensive, etc. I once thought it would be a good place for me and Andy to plop down for awhile, but I’m not so sure anymore. Good luck in Cozumel, I hope it works out for you!

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    • A lot has changed even in the last 2 years. Housing has practically doubled in price if you’re anywhere near the center. There’s also a higher tax in the restaurants which makes that more expensive as well. It’s really a shame.

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  15. Good on you for listening to your gut! It was really trying to get your attention, ya? There’s nothing that says we have to like a place, or stay in it if we think we’d be happier somewhere else. We love Kauai, but the wanderlust called strong. We know we’ll be back. If Europe calls you, as it does me, we both will get back eventually. Just think if we’d never been to these places we love what we’d have missed! Aloha!

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    • I so agree! If an area isn’t working, move the heck on! If it works well, stay by all means. Sometimes an area needs more time, and I think we definitely gave it a good shot.

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  16. Sometimes if things don’t feel right you just have to change gears! Life’s too short 🙂

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  17. When you (if you ever do, and if I ever get around to writing it!) read my post about why I am back in El Médano in Tenerife please don’t think I am copying you! But I could easily substitute names and this would be exactly how I am feeling right now. I have been following your recent journey intensely because you and I seem to be experiencing very similar thoughts of late, though for different reasons. The outcome, however, for the moment may be the same I think. Enjoy the summer in Cozumel!!

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  18. Not shocked. I haven’t liked PDC since the 80s. And now it’s just yuck! Cozy is always a winner. Enjoy!

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  19. I’ve found time and again that I am the WORST at predicting whether I will love a place or not and of all the things you can fake on the road, that feeling of “home” just isn’t one of them. It sounds like you gave Playa the best shot you could but it just wasn’t for you… these things happen. I think often the best thing we can do is just take things a day at a time and forget about dealing with all possible scenarios and instead focus on what is here and now. Cozumel might not end up being your permanent base, but if it feels like home for now, then that is all that really matters!

    (Also, I’d be really interested to hear about cost of living on Cozumel as it’s a place I’d certainly be interested in—the diving!—but I worry it would be well outside of our budget…)

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    • It’s pretty affordable here. If you’re going to be diving a lot, especially during off season, you can work out some good deals with the dive centers. There is also pretty inexpensive shore diving. Groceries are pretty reasonable, too.

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  20. I know what you mean. I was so ready to settle somewhere that I signed a six-month lease here, and now I’m ready to move on. I’m just going to make the best of it, and travel a lot, but I’m disappointed in myself for not taking some time to get more of a feeling for how it is now rather than how it used to be.

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    • I’m to the point now where signing a lease makes me feel ill. I’m so glad our current place doesn’t require it or a big deposit. It’s so hard sometimes.

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  21. My husband and I have a current discussion about intuition and being in tune with your intuition. It’s good you followed your gut instinct. The best decisions I’ve made in life were when I followed my intuition.

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