“You’re so lucky!” is a common statement I get when describing our adventures and our life to people. Chasing a dream has really very little to do with luck. I know people mean well by that comment, and I certainly do feel blessed, but this type of lifestyle didn’t just drop into my lap.
I’ve worked hard to make this life a reality and to keep it afloat.
“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” – Les Brown
Power of intention
I know it sounds all New Age-y and hippie, but it actually does work. I’ve seen it time and time again that what we put out into the universe gets returned to us. It isn’t always in the way that you expect, and sometimes it comes at the very last possible moment, but it always arrives.
Some of us are control freaks, and if we aren’t, many of us fill in the gap by being major worrywarts. That is one of the most fruitless exercises around. Especially if you believe, as I do, that what you focus on is the reality you manifest.
I was never really a control freak per se, but I’ve had enough of a hard life to not always believe that good would come my way. I believed you have to work like a dog (you do) to get anywhere in this world, and part of that was trying to face every possible scenario and being prepared for it.
Talk about exhausting!
So many teachers come into our lives in various forms, and for me one of my greatest teachers was my eldest son C. When I had to give up temporary custody so that we could get him into a special program, the ensuing aftermath of loss of control almost did me in.
I mean that in all the serious weight of that phrase. I was profoundly depressed again and suicidal. I held things together for Tigger. Medication that usually would lift me out of my cloud within 1-2 days took over a week to bring me from the very depths of despair where I was anchored.
One day I just decided to view some of the social worker’s restrictions in a different light. Rather than seeing it as the County taking away my rights, I decided to view it as them relieving me of a bunch of weight from my shoulders. I no longer had to worry and fight and figure everything out. It was now their responsibility.
And suddenly joy crept back into my life.
That moment was one of the greatest lessons for the rest of my life, and I’ve held onto it ever since. And as trite as it sometimes sound, life really is what you make of it and how you perceive it. A given situation can be viewed from different angles, and some of those angles are quite ugly.
In planning to leave on our adventure, I made the determination that I wouldn’t allow stupid things like fear, panic, and doubt rule me. Sure, they knocked at the door, sometimes loudly, but it didn’t mean I had to let them in. Whenever I would start getting worried, I would stop myself, and say “No! This WILL work. End of story. Moving on.”
It ALWAYS works out
Part of the reason for leaving the US for a nomadic lifestyle was to have more time with my son. I set my intent that this was one of my main goals, and all things needed to align to that purpose. It wasn’t a request. I kept my work hours to a minimum so that I had plenty of time to snorkel, walk, visit, etc., with Tigger.
In the beginning I was tested sorely. We carefully stayed within our budget, but sometimes other costs would creep in, or I’d get lazy with my budgeting, and my bank account would get scarily low. To the point where I had maybe $20 and was over a week away from payday. Life in some countries is pretty cheap, but it usually isn’t THAT cheap!
I decided to fight every inclination to worry and instead simply believe that the Universe had our best interests at heart. I believed everything would work out.
And it did.
We were invited to meals, an unexpected refund came in, I discovered a different way of getting to another destination that would save us more money, etc. It wasn’t always what I wanted or expected, but it always worked out.
In June of last year, I decided that I wanted to try and make writing my main income source rather than transcription. I set my intent, made some connections, and trudged forward believing it would happen. By October, after a couple of rough bumps in the road, I believed I was at that point and gave notice to the company I had contracted with, and by November I was no longer doing transcription.
Believe in yourself and in your desires
There’s nothing wrong with wanting a better life or a life that you’ve imagined and created. It doesn’t make you selfish because you want to live a different way than your family, friends, or anyone else. I don’t care if that’s living as we do, going back to school, changing careers, starting a business, whatever.
It took me years to learn, accept, and believe that I have a right to be happy and to live life on my terms.
But ultimately I believe I can do whatever I decide I truly want to do. I believe that my desire to raise my child as a global citizen, to expose him to other cultures, and to instill in him a belief that he can do and be whatever he chooses is worthwhile, fair, and even beautiful.
And I believe everyone else can, too. I’m no one special. I just had some dreams and decided to turn them into reality, and I refused to take no for an answer.
Putting it into practice
- Start by identifying what it is you truly want to accomplish. Don’t let other people’s expectations cloud that for you. As a young person I let people talk me out of my dreams because they weren’t, in their view, realistic. “How can you support a family on that salary?” “How will you earn a living?” “That’s a really tough program to get into.” I allowed people to rob me of my dreams! Screw them! It’s your life! If they choose to live a life of limited possibilities, well, that’s their loss.
- Write it down. If you have people in your life you can trust to be supportive, share your dream with them. The more you talk about it, the more energy you’re sending toward manifesting it.
- Set a date. Pick a date and write it on the calendar. Be realistic, but not overly realistic. Obviously, if your dream is to become a doctor and you’ve never been to college, setting a goal of 2 years is not reality. But don’t set it too far out, either. Even breaking it out into steps can be helpful: This is the date I’m going to start the process, by this date I will be at a certain point, and by this date I’ll be finished. Having a bunch of obtainable smaller goals on the way to the big one will help keep you positive and motivated.
- Setting a concrete goal is really important. The more you remind yourself of your goal, and the more you tell others you’re going to do it, the easier it is to stay on the path. Especially when your friends Fear and Doubt pay a visit. And they will.
- Believe you deserve it. If you need help with that, enlist friends and loved ones to remind you of it. It’s hard, but don’t let how people have treated you in the past make you believe their lies. You deserve to be happy! You ARE worth it!
- Start practicing the art of letting go. Now. Like, this very minute. When you feel worry and doubts come in, catch yourself, tell yourself it’s nonsense, and remind yourself of what WILL happen. Focus on that and let fear and doubt find someone else to bug. Turning your dream into reality isn’t just a fanciful option. Don’t accept any other outcome.
- If you see something as impossible, too hard, too tragic, etc., stop! Change your viewing angle. There truly is no good or bad situation. It’s all perception. That may sound hokey, but I’ve seen it be true far too many times.
Start chasing a dream right now. And if you feel bold enough, I’d love you to share what one of those dreams is that you plan on turning into reality in the comments section below, or on our Facebook page. Join me in the land of infinite possibilities!
The other type of life is too damn boring.